From 12 to 2

From 12 to 2

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I have had many different hairstyles in my life, even one that matched my husband….scroll to the end for that gem, but I have never had my hair 2 inches or less. The shortest I had ever had my hair, in my adult life, was to my shoulders. So why did I go from 12 inches to shaved on one side, to now 2 inches? The simple answer was to help curb my anxiety.

I am a perfectionist to the core and I’m not sure, but have an inkling, as to why. I always had to have my hair lay perfectly and if it was up, there could be no bumps or holes, unless I wore it “messy”. Even with the messy hairstyle it took me tugging and tying for awhile to get it where I wanted it. This is exhausting just typing this.

To preface, I love both of my kiddos very much, but motherhood can be tough. I have two very rambunctious boys who are curious and love to just live their childhood. I wouldn’t have this any other way. However, with motherhood comes possible ailments, such as postpartum depression. It’s in the name postpartum (after childbirth), you have to give birth to experience this, but not every mother does, thankfully. I am not one of the lucky ones.

Postpartum is a very sneaky disease that shows up without any notice. It’s a disease that hurts in both your mind and heart. These sweet little beings that you have created become strangers and unbeknownst to them you are not yourself. You become empty. You search for solutions. I tried meditations, writing, music, medications etc., so many different outlets, and nothing worked. I did however find solace in running. Running became my escape. It made me feel better. It made me a better mom.

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Running aside, I still felt like I didn’t have enough time and energy to curb my anxiety, again, perfectionist here. I needed to make some other changes. I needed a better start to my day. When I had a full head of hair it would take me 45 minutes to an hour to shower, blow dry and style my hair. My arms would be tired and I would be anxiety ridden before my morning even got a start. This was definitely a good place to start. I chopped it. I even had her shave one side of my head just to minimize as much time spent on my hair in the morning…to make it to where I didn’t need to be a perfectionist.

This took a lot of getting used to, but cut time spent on my hair from 45 to an hour, to a little over 15 minutes. This gave me time to do my favorite morning routine….snuggling with my babes and watching a movie.

The shaved head lasted for a little bit, but then I realized that it was a lot to keep up with so I grew it out and am now at about 2 inches. From 12 to 2 and I gained a lot more time and peace. My postpartum is now gone, not completely, but for the most part. I’m not saying you need to cut your hair, but it’s definitely a good place to start! Short hair unite.

-Jazz

I’m on the right….

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