It's a...

It's a...

Saying that this pregnancy has been anything less than challenging would be a very large lie.

After having my second son, my husband and I decided that we wanted to try one more time for a little girl. This would be the last one because let’s face it our sanity and pocketbooks wouldn’t be able to handle anymore than three. We tried and tried and nothing happened. Test after test, false alarm after false alarm and nothing. I came to the conclusion that I was going to be a boy mom and I was ok with that. In fact, I was at peace with it. My boys are amazing and sweet. I started giving things away and selling things, purging baby items and happily letting go of my dream of a big family and a little girl.

During this time my grandmother, who had been riddled with different ailments and illnesses, fell extremely ill. She ended up passing in March and my mind was turned to the sorrow of losing her and the joy that my boys were able to know her, if even for a few years. Two weeks after her passing, my husband was visited by her in a dream. She told him to hold on just a little bit longer, that she was trying to find our daughter. He woke up in a cold sweat and told me about it.

I wondered if this was just wishful thinking or if this was something that would actually come to fruition. We had stopped trying, this is usually when it happens, and two weeks later I found out that I was pregnant. Could it be? Was this real?

I have already told you about my oldest and his fortune-telling ways. As well as, the loss of one of my sweet little babes. I am still working day by day to be ok with what happened. To find my happy place again. I have said it once before and I will say it until the day I die, Baby A was a part of me, physically, for a few weeks but will forever be in my heart.

Going back to my fortune-teller son, he continuously told us after the loss of the other baby that Baby B was a girl. We decided to go to a 3D/4D Ultrasound place, First Glimpse, to see if Baby B would give us a glimpse.

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She did.

That’s right. She. My grandmother found her. She found our sweet Margrit Lillie. Our family will be complete January of next year and we are beyond words for the emotions that we have felt and are still feeling throughout this entire experience.

I wanted to end this with a thank you to my grandmother. I love you forever and always. You will live on in our hearts and forever with Margrit.

-Jazz

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